IT Haiku: Rejection

Oh strobing banner,
Seizure-inducing cheese ball,
Dream on. Me no click.

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ASK AUNT CALAMITY
Technology Maven & Advice Columnist.


Dear Aunt Calamity:
What's your take on the Active Denial System, a non-lethal energy beam the military says can be safely used to inflict short-term pain on its targets, encouraging them to leave an area? Sounds kind of dangerous to me.
- Wendy L., Wheeling, IL

Dear Wendy:
Interestingly, I proposed a less expensive, alternative crowd dispersal/enemy personnel repellent technology to the military just last year. It involved airdropped, parachute-outfitted boomboxes blasting Michael Bolton songs through a bandpass filter that spiked the 300-3400 Hz vocal frequencies. As effective as they were in testing, word was leaked out and the Pentagon received an earful from a number of human rights organizations. Believe me, a light microwaving is far, far less likely to cause severe and permanent damage.
- Aunt Calamity

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